The stage has been set and all you need to do is play your part. Life is to be lived and not dictated by the terms others have set for you. You’d never know what’s really important until you have taken some wrong turns in life. To do that you have to try and explore the arena to be sure of where you are going.
We are by-products of a generation that was faithful and devoted to their families, one company, one job. A lot of them pursued degrees not of choice but under pressure, and got into jobs or businesses which they continued throughout their adult lives. Things are different for most of those from Gen Z as parents are more open to the idea of their children exploring possibilities before they narrow down to one, rather than limiting them with restricted opinions and perceptions. Having said it, it is needless to say that exceptions do always exist.
Time for the truth bomb –Only a handful know what exactly they are doing. They are all discovering themselves and figuring out life as it happens along the way.
You can’t rush your timelines or your discovery for your true passion. In terms of a career, you could be pursuing a course of your dislike resulting in a disgruntling job and a dissatisfying career. Let’s remember that your career is something you will be engaged in for most of your adult life and a majority of your life. Being sure of what you are doing is imperative as it will dictate a lot of other factors in your life – your income, lifestyle, physical and mental health, peace and how well you succeed in what you do. All of this will determine your concept of self-worth and self-concept.
In most of the conversations you undertake as an adult, one question you would frequently be asked is – “So, what do you do?” The answer could range from “I am a doctor or investment banker” to “I am a blogger or homemaker”. Let’s ensure whatever you answer, you can say that with conviction and passion, meaning that it should make you happy in the end. You should be able to say with confidence that you’re happy doing what you do.
You always wished to be a doctor. But this can always change even if you are pursuing a medical degree. The important thing to note here is – you are allowed to change your mind and do what you like. Passion to help people could push you to take up a course in medicine, but along the way, you may realise it’s not for you and that you’d like to shift to a different field. Hence, there are no absolutes here.
The conscious stream of life updates on social media about what one is doing and the constant popular urge to update important life events on various platforms, is draining, unreal, and often unhealthy. Then there is always a ‘Sharma ji ka beta’ who seems to have achieved everything there could be in life. There has to be a stop to the upward comparison with others if they know what they are doing or seem to be looking like they do. Whoever has this placement with XYZ package should not impede your journey towards becoming that baker or scientist that you always wanted to.
Yes, you are not alone. Accept that others are one the same journey like you, feeling the same pangs of confusion and self-doubt. There’s a lurking unsaid expectation from those around you to have it figured out till a certain point in your life or else you have failed. Have compassion towards yourself and others to help navigate through this. Everyone feels the same way as you and are in the same boat as you. Those who seem to have it all figured are also having bouts of anxiety about the future.
The most perfect plans could fail and take you in a different direction, that sets the course of your journey in a new light. You are not a loser if things don't pan out the way you’d planned they would. Courses, universities and admissions are difficult, and take a toll on the best of the best. Embrace the changes and trajectories with a smile on your face. One hiccup in your journey does not mean your life is over. Be flexible and open to opportunities, there will be plenty.
Have no pressure to play out your life by what others think or say about you, your life or your choices. What “they” might think becomes miniscule in the larger scheme of things when you know what you want to do in your life. There’s ample time to do what you want even if you haven’t begun yet. The right gig and time will come, you will have to be patient and continue to work hard. Choose a group of people and a small circle that promotes, honours and celebrates your growth. A group of trusted advisors among friends and family, that act as your confidantes and cheerleaders for life, should be created and cherished.
How you speak about yourself is important. Whatever you do in your life and whatever you might choose to do, the sure-shot skill that will always make you successful is believing in yourself. Things might not always go according to plan, but moving at your own pace and not forcing things to happen can surely ease the journey. Criticising yourself will not get you in the MBA college any faster, chances are, it will hamper your progress.
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Whenever you are looking at career options and trying to narrow down on one for yourself, look within and answer these questions:-
In reality, it’s impossible to have it all figured out. You will continuously have new experiences, meet new people, travel to new places and discover new passions and interests. While it’s important to stay true to your authentic true self and what you believe in, taking on the societal pressure of having a sorted life in your early twenties will stunt your spiritual and professional growth. Sometimes in life getting on the wrong train from the incorrect station takes you to the right destination. The thing to remember is it's okay to not have your career figured out as of today. Life is a learning process and a journey of personal transformation.
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Parisraja Bajpai is an Organisational Psychologist, with extensive hands-on experience in talent acquisition, talent management, employee counselling, employee engagement, training and development. She is currently heading HR department at Nexstgo. Views represented in this article are solely of the author and do not represent those of the organisation they are associated to.