Hello Friend,

First of all I really appreciate that you have asked this question. Not many open up and come forward to speak this suffering. After going through your question carefully, I feel that you can definitely come out of this situation as you have poured your heart out and are now ready to change yourself. So first things first, it does not matter that you have wasted many years in fake studies for bank preparation, what matters is if you have realized now that you were faking to study now you can become serious and really study for something which really matters to you. Even 1 year of seriously studying something which matters to you and pulls you is much better than faking to study in something simply because you want status/ respect in society out of the job you will get. The core issue why this is happening with you is because, 1) You don't know why in the first place you are doing what you are doing, 2) You are doing to gain status/respect in society and now you have realized you are not interested in these studies but you value societal status more than your inner well being.

Now you are asking how should you prepare for GA in last 2.5 months left. This  shows that you are stuck in a vicious circle and the more you are trying, the more you are getting stuck.

In the last part you said you are now feeling suicidal. My friend, I know one thing for sure- a person like you who speaks up about what he is suffering on such a big platform is indeed very brave and just needs a bit of support. We all are here to help you. As a friend I would advise you to watch video of "Acharya Prashant" on  youtube. Just search- "Acharya Prashant on career".

In the end we all are here always for your help. Feel free to ask any help. Your are a very brave guy.

Hope to hear from you soon.